Theory of Intelligence

9 12 2009

‘Well  you see, Norm, it’s like this . . . A herd of  buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest  buffalo; and when the herd is hunted, it is the  slowest and weakest ones at the back that are  killed first. This natural selection is good for  the herd as a whole, because the general speed and  health of the whole group keeps  improving by the  regular killing of the weakest members. In much  the same way, the human brain can only operate as  fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know,  excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But
naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest  brain cells first.  In this way, regular  consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain  cells, making the brain a faster and more  efficient machine.

And that, Normie, is why you always feel smarter after a few  beers.’

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